Yesterday was a bad day

Yeah so yesterday sucked It started out fine

M went to work and i was just at home listening to Rob Thomas and getting ready to

walk the dog when some song came on...i think it was ever the same...

I wasnt even really listening to it just all of a sudden got sad about mum

Then i turned it off and went for a walk but it followed me

kind of like a soul sucking ache in your heart pain

Its hard to describe it was like reality was saying to me shes gone shes gone

And i was just trying to walk away from it and trying to forget

My life was good before you know....i had my M my family and pets

We werent rich or poor but doing ok in all accounts

Before cancer happened to my family and ended my moms life so suddenly

I think i thought bad things wouldnt happen to us

i mean bad things had happened

Getting diagnosed with MS a week before my wedding was horrible

But i kind of thought that was it like ok heres my bad luck i will be strong and deal with it

Then BAM POW first nanny, then angel baby and then my fucking mom

I dont even know how im still sane

But theres something inside of me that keeps fighting

I wont let something that hurt my mom hurt me so fully as well

For my strong beautiful mom I will get up i will smile I will walk the dog

I wont be scared to listen to music I will write my blog and I will live

So many people forget but thats the hugest thing she has given me

To respect and never take for granted that life is beautiful

I love you so much mum

I miss hugging you talking to you laughing with you reading beside you cooking with you

Everything....but i will

Keep Smiling,

S.